Cut Some Slack

The DIY Pomander rose turned out lovely i.e the colors but failed to complete. I bought the styrofoam to big and the roses were insufficient to cover half of it. 

I'm too lazy to go to hokko with due to payday and many reckless crazy drivers on the road so I will go there sometime next week to commence back where I left of. 

If I'm not mistaken it was last two weeks that me and my girls went to visit two wedding boutiques to search for the perfect color to wear on our sanding day. We all went with our fiance to get their opinions and what color suits them best and we girls went together to prevent any color clashes. The first boutique we went was in Kiulap. Load of varieties of songket to choose from and what i like about it this boutique, it's arranged accordingly to colors. However, we had a small argument there with the person in charge and cancelled out that boutique. We're now down to two choices. Then we went to the well known boutique in Mabohai, all of us came out happy and content. =) I found the perfect color for our morning reception ceremony and booked the songket for further discussion with the personals. 

Then the wedding preparation just stop there. Last week I did not even flick through my wedding book, did not go to google and search for inspiration. Noting. Just blog hopping on brides to be blogs. 

Eh wait, well I did a little. I went to Miri, Sarawak on Sunday and bought flowers for the decoration on my guest book corner. I hope the "guest book" corner will be utilize efficiently because you know our culture don't really get the "write down a note for the bride and groom" bit. Well, that's not the point, i went to Miri in search for the Foam flower roses. Cinta, situated at Mega Hotel do sell foam rose flower but it's not what i expect, noting near to what i bought in Hokko nor what Wedding Tiara bought in Sabah. Set aside those foam flowers, they do sell very nice artificial flowers too, lilies look great and real. Trays? saw this new arrival trays which i assume is the "in" thing now selling for RM$65.30 each. I will update on the picture soon after I sync my phone. But damn, that's expensive for a tray. At Miri, me and the other half went and browse for bedroom sets, mattress and lighting. Love some, hate few so we will decide along this few months either to execute the plan or continue searching. 

I'm cutting some slack with this wedding preparation simply because it has caused a lot of stress to me. I'm not the only one feeling it but my girls too. Thinking about the planning process, the financial issues.. yea talk about how expensive wedding nowadays are got into us madly! To a point where I told the other half, "Can we not talk about wedding?" and Alhamdulillah, I feel better and at ease. 9 more months to go and out of that 9 months I don't wish to talk about wedding everyday right.. there will be at least a week or two that sums up to around 1 month you've got to cut some slack. I'm not sure if other brides to be is feeling the same way like I do. I'm as excited as all the brides to be too. We all want our wedding to be near perfect right? 

I'll stop my ranting. 

Wishing all the chinese our there Gong Xi Fa Chai! Happy Wabbit New Year  =) and have a lovely holiday.  

This and That

I don't know how brides to be managed to plan everything in less than 6 months! I have to salute those brides that can pull of her own wedding preparations in such short time!

I can't believe that my wedding will be this year! I kept mentioning at vendors, tailors, videographer that my wedding will be next year not realizing i am already in the "next year" i.e 2011! Less than a year to go for preparations and the other half is also starting to get the preparation vibes.

Bride's to be.. whatever preparations that needs to be done.. the one most IMPORTANT thing i can't stress more is WEDDING DATES! because all the business deals is all about time! Alhamdulillah we decided on a date so bookings can be made pronto without any hiccups *i hope*

For my Make up Artist, Alhamdulillah i've sealed the deal with few MUA as recommended by friends and family members. For my Akad Nikah & Hantar Berian is already booked! Leaving me two minor events for Berbedak Siang and Muleh 3 Hari..

As for the search for videographer..  Thank you so much to Dinda. I've found the one i love and managed to contact the videographer, sealed the deal. Deposit will be done this sunday! I even recommend the videographer to my best friend and she even sealed the deal right away. Thank you again dinda.

Videographer in brunei is still limited so i rely on dinda side toggle to search for one =)

1. Adam Groves  <3
2. Masamichi Studio <3
3. Cinematicpro  
4. Songket Tiara
5. Snowberry Studio
6. Rajul Adli

As for my wedding attire, I've bought textiles from Indonesia and will drop by the wedding bridal boutique soon when the other half goes on leave. =) 

• Majlis Akad Nikah & Hantar Berian - Still pending probably in March Jakarta trip
• Majlis Berbedak Siang - DONE! need to get quotation and send to tailor
• Majlis Berbedak Malam - DONE! need to get quotation and send to tailor
• Malam Berpacar - DONE! need to get quotation and send to tailor
• Majlis Bersanding - NEED TO GO BRIDAL BOUTIQUE SOON! 
• Malam Ambil-Ambilan - Pending probably buy textiles in Jakarta Trip.
• Muleh 3 Hari - DONE! need to get quotation and send to tailor

As for my shoes that i'll be using on the events... ALL DONE! *lol* See, this is the FIRST thing that is completed! Shoes! Alahai just when i thought that i won't purchase any shoes... well i did... 4 pairs to be exact! i have a total of 7 new pairs of shoes waiting for the perfect time~ So no more shoe shopping or shoe testing or whatever goes along shoe fitting. I bet you ladies understand the love.. the feel when the shoe just fits perfectly and for not buying it? Is such a pity to see the shoe being display not having an owner yet.. hahaha 

As for my Doorgifts... gahhh too much to talk about.. might talk about this when march comes along.. so  many!!! 

As for my Wedding Invitation... I'm still searching for a place in Brunei that offers considerable price. Yes you can call me Karit i.e Stingy. But I'm not spending more than B$1.00 for my wedding invites. I just feel it's such a waste to spend more than that when you know once your event is done, it will be thrown away to trash. Might as well use that money for something else worthy. Initial plan was to make the invitation in Jakarta. I even had the one that i love brought back with me BUT with the hassle of emailing, money transfers, the cost of ticket and all sorts. It sort of balances out don't you think so? Then had thought of making them in Malaysia but again, the excess baggage! 

Eh macam macam lagi kan d buat ani eh.. kepisan! 

Take care lovelies! <3

The Beauty

Alhamdulillah I'm progressing smoothly... 

Make up Artist 

I have tons of recommendations from friends, relatives and from my blog hopping on make up artist, going through their portfolios, checking out their make up under different lightning and I have finalize all my make up artist. 

Event 1: Majlis Bebedak Siang - Still searching.. thinking of getting trials because it'll be a simple function noting over the top.

Event 2: Majlis Akad Nikah & Hantar Berian - I try calling her but she ran out of credit.. text her but no reply... still no firm confirmation

Event 3: Majlis Berbedak - BOOKED! =) 

Event 4: Majlis Berpacar - BOOKED!  =) 

Event 5: Majlis Bersanding - BOOKED! =)

Event 6: Majlis Ambil- Ambilan - BOOKED! =)

Event 7: Muleh 3 Hari/7 Hari - Still pending because no confirm dates yet... 

I know I am months ahead on my wedding day but to get the best make up artist is tough now a days.. you have to booked them at least 1 year ahead to fit comfortably in their schedule.. 

Do feel free to contact me if you need any recommendations... =) I have a lot of Make Up Artist numbers with me.. It would be best to contact me personally for their numbers than me sharing it publicly because some make up artist wants their number to be privatize. 

Photographers

I believe in moments, photographers being able to capture the moment of happiness in the bride & groom eye's, the family members, guest and etc. I love looking at artistic sharp moments that by just looking at one photograph can explain how the environment in the wedding look like. So hiring a professional photographer is not a waste. Pricy it will be but the I trust the output from it will be very rewarding. 

My mom told me "It's once in a life time so no matter how expensive it is as long as it's beautiful and captured the moments" =) love my mom so much for being understanding and supporting! 

So, i've finalize my photographer for THREE Major events paying slightly premium. The idea was to hire a professional photographer to cover the two events that has me and the other half in it. Because the output i.e the album will have two of us in it instead of me alone which will be boring.. 

Alhamdulillah, I've paid the deposit for firm confirmation and date blocked for me on the three events. Paying by installment monthly with a handful amount and what's great about it that.. I'll finish paying them by April. Way ahead from my wedding date. Plus plus. <3 

For the minor single events such as Malam Berpacar, Malam Ambil-Ambilan & Muleh 3/7 Hari.. I have already a few top list photographers. Will have an appointment with them soon after the other half comes back from work. If I'm satisfied with their portfolio than i'll secure a deposit to block the following dates for the events. 

I'll update more on my attire &  doorgifts... attire that i'll be using for the following events.. fabrics bought for some major events.. leaving few things need to be done... and doorgifts.. sorted! Leaving a little more to do.. will update more on that soon? 

Perhaps this would be my last entry for this year.. 

Wishing EVERYONE a BLESSING HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011! 

To the BRIDE TO BE in 2011! Say hello to your wedding year~ =) 

To those tying the knot on new years day.. Selamat Menempuh Alam Perkahwinan and especially to Hazlynda.. Selamat Pengantin Baru <3 

Discussion of dates.

Photo Courtesy of Mark Parisi

The MOST vital issue is your wedding date! because everything revolves around it from venue, make up artist, photographers, videographers, pelamin, catering, tents etc. etc.

Discussion should also be made among your family and the other half family with acceptance to some close relative and never ever take account what distant relatives or friends views because what i understand and heard from past brides, accounting to people needs = you can never have your wedding because there will be hundreds or possible thousands of reasons for e.g. your relative neighbor son's is getting married sometime next year.. then there's "i'll be very busy at that month because its the peak hour at work" and loads of other reasons. That made you postponed and more like accounting to their needs but not them accounting to your needs. Besides, it's your wedding. 

Sure i took account of my best friend's and friends wedding date to avoid any clashes of guest. Another thing is relatives who are like my first cousin who plan on getting married but, since we're only left two who is still single waiting to be hitch that is not a big issue to discuss. Holidays, will people be available by then? exam season? o levels? a levels? summer holiday? minor stuff that yes, can actually give a huge impact. For example, your cash flow. Say, you were saving for 18 months and on a tight budget, the next thing you know, your wedding is being fast forward 3 months early, Every month your saving is like around $2000... with that just 3 months i.e $6000 you could pay off your rent at the wedding boutique or your photographer. See the huge difference?

Anyhow, enough ranting. Alhamdulillah that my family and the other half family have discuss on our wedding date. We were asked to list out three options that we both preferred and comfortable with. My brother and sister in law being my advisor to maintain the date with reference to the available cash by then because I'm avoiding personal loans. The other half family understands and taking into account festive season, the starting of semesters in UK this and that. Fist option was middle of october towards the end october. Second was the 1st week of november. Third option was end november towards early december. We scrap off the second option because Hari Raya Aidiladha falls on probably the 6th November or 7th November. Risky i suppose. Then the third option is a little too far and very close to my best-friend's wedding, entrance for masters in UK is also past due by then. So we go along the first option! A balance! from rough discussion to have it on early november is being forwarded to end of october. No objection from both sides of the family and cash flow is safe!

So... InsyAllah.. badan sihat murah rezeki... OCTOBER 2011 it is... 

You know at one point, this wedding thing is all about the money!! No money = no talk with vendors = no business with venues = no talk with photographers etc. banar inda? 

I hope and i wish that there will be no amendment of dates. We tried our best to avoid that 11.11.11 date because we know everyone is going for that~ we sacrifice not having a beautiful date for our wedding~ just as long as we're married and both of us is happy. That's all that matters the most. 

One of the reasons why I hope and wish there are no changes is simply because..

I've booked the venue+catering for my reception.. Alhamdulillah they still have slot for october. Deposit to be made next month and by then, i have a promised venue and catering. 

I'll start on the MUA soon, still browsing.. 

Photographers will be after my Jakarta Shopping Spree.. 

My fiance told me... 

Times wait for no one.. 

Banar jua tu ah.. mun kan mensatisfy orang lain punya needs..anak si atu lah kan kawin jua... sibuk kraja lah.. peak time lah.. this and that...  tani pun inda kawin sampai bila bila.. Now just let them sync with you and not you sync with them... agree? 

And also one thing.. about times wait for no one.. if you take this discussion of date lightly... and if you decide to have your wedding elsewhere apart from your home would be so hard and stressful because searching for the perfect place  that can fit the perfect invitation is hard~ then your MUA might also have other clients to attend, your vendors, your caterings~ ALL ABOUT TIME! 

2011 Wedding Dates

Good day all brides to be..

It will be another week till be bid farewell to the most holy month; Ramadhan before stepping to the festive season; Syawal where working hours will be long and back to the normal days. Hopefully this year Ramadhan will be more meaningful than previous and even more meaning in later years InsyAllah. May Allah accept your every Doa and shower his countless blessings upon you and your entire family. *amin*

So it just struck me that calender days in 2011 will have quiet a number of BEST DATES to be getting married. I was browsing through my calender roughly thinking what date is best for the wedding on november next year. Then! If i were to have my wedding on 11 November 2011, it'll be like 11.11.11 the SIX one's. As nice it may sound i bet a lot of wedding will be happening on those dates!

Here's what i came across that coincidently falls on peak days:

• January Wedding, 1st January 2011 (1.11.11) - Saturday
• November Wedding, 20th November 2011 (20.11.2011) - Sunday
• November Wedding, 11th November 2011 (11.11.11) - Friday

I have two choices, either to have a wedding with a date that is easy to be remembered knowing that there will be a lot of clashes and weddings happening around OR just set any dates and no crowd clashes. 

I like the idea of ANY dates is alright. Would you even believe that me and the other half don't remember much on our anniversary? and YES, that ticker on the dashboard is really helpful after I had to find my old diary remembering on the day the other half proposed! We became a couple in a different way, he proposed and i gave him an answer after quiet sometime later~ yes, the wait is long.. so we didn't really get that exact date and just roughly estimate~ Upon anniversaries, that most of the time me and the other half forgets! either one of us will go "Ouh! January~ its the day we met again after so long! Happy Anniversary!" We were schoolmates back in primary, then years later we went into a situation where "hey, your are familiar? have we met?" kind of thing and starting keeping in touch with each other and one leads to another and this is what we end up..  

So what I'm trying to imply for myself here is that, It would be nice and lovely to have a beautiful date on the wedding to remember by but then again, after thinking hard... any dates would be alright... Gahhhh... I'm rambling here... panic on the thoughts of having clash weddings with friends or family members! 

I'm still feeling blur and not having that Festive Season Vibe yet? Is it me or there's anyone feeling this way too? =( I haven't even start baking when I did plan of making Kek Lapis and some biscuits. Purchase some brownies. Probably bake profiteroles or eclairs for 1st day hari raya, red velvet cupcakes for guest. BUT why oh why I don't have the vibe yet.. No vibe = No mood = No baking! 

I want begawan solo biscuits...  

The Hantaran Shopping

I and the other half decide to start buying out hantaran stuff. I can say that the fiancé mother is excited because she bought quiet a number of items already such as Majlis berbedak favors for the people membedaki. Semangat right? But it’s so exciting to listen to what fiancé’s mother has in mind too. Early this year, I overindulge on a shoe for my solemnization ceremony because it was love at first sight and had it shopped and sent to Brunei. Then just early this month when the fiancé’s mother came back, she showed me this beautiful ivory shoe bedazzled and simply gorgeous! She told me to use it for solemnization ceremony or place it in the hantaran. The shoe that I bought has a heel of 4” and slightly bigger, I’m having second thoughts about wearing them. I love the shoe that fiancé’s mother bought and the heel is 2.5”, I’m confident that I’ll wear them and confidently without having thoughts of toppling over. I’m torn between choices however I have like a year to think about it!

Enough rambling! Eheee

Back to hantaran items, at first we plan on buying it one time event. Go on a holiday shopping trip for hantaran items but then again, we thought it will be heavy for us; financially. So we came to a number of lists of hantaran to give and received. The other half and I decide that there will no gadgets involving so no laptop, phone, cameras, and game console. It will be just pure classic! I’m still unsure on how the rules play here but I heard the number of dulang must be odd numbers so 11 versus 13?


First task! Shop for my other half first. Since he’s on training overseas I told him to grab anything that doesn’t have an expiry date and is evergreen. I planned on letting him buy his own desire shoes, work wear that won’t go outdated, belts, stationary set and pen. I really wish I can be there to go shopping but work doesn’t allow me too. But anyway, stuff like perfumes and toiletries will buy next year on another shopping trip. With the list below I hope that we won’t go overboard in the budget *insyallah*

--
The idea is to buy barang sikit-sikit so inda kerasahan that the list is all done by the time on our wedding. Inda jua berat financially and that makes shopping everymonth! Nda jua membazir money splurging on unnecessary stuff because kitani buying stuff for wedding. Savings atu memang ada lah for paying the caterings, venues, bridal boutique, photographer, videographer etc. and the rest of the balance money from the payroll are items for hantaran. Personally, I think I’ll save more because if I were to have that extra money from payroll; I tend to shop unnecessary stuff. Eheee. So the mind set is “ALL FOR WEDDING”


Here is what I planned on putting in the Majlis Hantaran


The woman’s side:


1. The Holy Al-Quran will be designed with the Telekong Sembahyang. (dapat kan ne? it doesn’t have to go individually right?)
2. Wang Mas Kawin
3. Wang belanja Angus
4. Sebidang Jong Sarat
5. Sirih Junjung
6. Watch
7. A pair of shoe
8. A handbag and a wallet
9. Bathroom toiletries with perfumes
10. Make up set & facial products.
11. Sweets & chocolates.


The Men’s side


1. Watch
2. A pair of shoe
3. A pen with other Stationary set
4. Work bag.
5. Work wear.
6. Casual wear. (*still deciding to replace this because the other half doesn’t want casual wear to be in the list)
7. Bathroom toiletries & shaver.
8. Sweets & Chocolates
9. Fruits
10. Fresh from oven items.
11. Food
12. Food
13. Food

//edited - To replace casual wear will be Cara Melayu & Kain Sampin =)

With this I hope it will give other brides-to-be guidance too on what's essential and what's not. I'm still searching on this Hantaran information because it feel that now its overated. Any ideas? I think what's very essential is Mas Kawin & Al-Quran? Correct me if i'm wrong.

Wedding Invitations

I’m so excited despite December is still far away just because… I with my parents, my maid of honor and bridesmaid bought confirm tickets to Jakarta already! We are really making it happening! Bridesmaid fiancé probably will be joining too just to get those extra kilos for baggage excess but he’ll redeem his tickets through the points he obtained. My brother did mention about claiming my miles I got from the return UK trip and two years ago miles and merging miles from my aunties who’s not using her card at all however, I’m too lazy to do the paperwork’s and sending those papers to the RBA office.


So this post I will be highlighting on the INVITATION CARDS.

Photo Courtesy of Vinas Invitation

Some recommend me to make invitation at Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia just because if there are any hiccups on the printing, going to Kuala Lumpur is much nearer and cheaper compared to going to Indonesia. Most of my friends did their invitation at Kuala Lumpur and various vendors. I will make another post on this on the list of vendors available in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia and Indonesia of that I know and found out.

First up, when I and the other half goggled on wedding invitations maker in Indonesia, Vinas Invitation  came up and it was love at first sight. They are based on Surabaya, Indonesia and I tell you, they give very prompt and professional reply when I ask on the quotation. You know how hard it gets when you need to tell your needs and how your invitation would look like and all.


So, I only asked how much for the picture above cost. They told me that everything depends on the material paper design i.e. hard cover of soft cover. So I assume soft cover would be much cheaper. I don’t see a point on spending much on invitation cards because it’ll be dispose eventually by the guest, correct? I’ve set myself a budget of not more than BND1000 for invitation, I’m wondering if BND$600 is sufficient enough to produce a well informed invitation card with elegance touch of white, white and more white! I’m mad over white color hence; I want everything to be white too! Years ago, my brother had his invitation done only BND$0.50 each! Very simple but I love it just because it’s white and have small heart shapes. Noting grand but I feel its good enough right?


Anyhow, this invitation card on the picture can be design to suite your theme and they may need to know if you’re looking for elegant, classic and many more themes. For 600 pieces, the price for each card will cost IDR150, 000 (≈ BND2.50). A bit pricy right? But I think you can negotiate to change the type of paper, few alteration to suite your estimated budget. So to place your order you just send your wordings on MS word and a sample will be given for free! Any correction will be altered and a final proof will be submitted to you for final checking. Everything can be done in 40days! Just pay for shipping cost just after you make the down payment. They accept payment from paypal and western union! How convenient is that? Vina’s invitation is professional and I guess have worked with Bruneians too because she knows the selok belok very well.

I received few suggestions making a recycle on the invitation, i.e. being more creative such as:

♥  Scroll Invitation

Photo Courtesy of Wedding-Calligraphy

Beautiful right? Maid of honor suggested, one side of the scroll will be the details of the wedding i.e. date, time, venue, bride’s & groom name, parents name and family names and the itinerary. The other side of the scroll could be some abstract drawings, poems or ayat-ayat or dua (Not advisable because you will be inviting non-muslims). I like the idea of it but not sure how much will it cost.


♥  Fan Invitation

Photo Courtesy of Invitationsbydawn

Photo Courtesy of Hotref

This type of invitation has been practiced a lot nowadays in Brunei. I’ve seen few people who use those paper fans as an invitation card. It’s very creative however, what I’ve came to realized is that the text tend to be much more smaller and elderly people really have a hard time reading whilst tilting their heads side to side.

♥  DVD Cover Invitation

Photo Courtesy of EternityDVD

Okay, no longer practiced here. Or shall i say Sooo last year.. hehe I guess this was years ago when DVD-case box invitation was famous but I don’t see any purpose unless you include a mixed CD inside it of compilation songs. Again, will your taste of music suites the guest invited?


♥ Calendar Invitation

Photo Courtesy of Sugarplumpaperie

Photo Courtesy of Momental Design

I LOVE THIS! And it’s practical~ everyone needs a calendar right? However, this is only practical for those whose wedding end of December in a transition of New Year or early January weddings! They are lot varieties of calendar type to choose from but it’s simple! The first two page will be the all the wedding details! Personally, if I were to have this as my wedding invites I like the calendar to be loosely and packed in a transparent CD case. You know that kind of CD case calendar! Would be lovely right? And if you’re creative and have the time, DIY is possible too! You could put in quotes, abstract pictures, and many more to make it more beautiful!

 

♥ Mug Invitation

Photo Courtesy of Beaucoup

The picture above is a personalized beer mug, but some sort of this tall glass mug or those ceramic mugs. I don’t have to elaborate more on this because I think you get the idea already. I guess there’s always a phase or years ago in the family that you or any family members have a picture in a mug or when your visit to Thailand that took your photo with a baby tiger and get it print on the mug because I did. *blush*

♥ Ceramic Plate Invitation

Photo Courtesy of Cassandramdesigns

I’ve only seen once in my lifetime that people use ceramic plate as an invitation because they exclude giving door gifts. The invitation is the door gifts. This will cost more than estimated because it’s personalized, same goes to the mug too.

 

Any more suggestions readers? Most welcome.

The Jakarta Trip

Photo Courtesy of Airlines-Airlines

I’m making it happen! Next payroll or probably later I’ll be purchasing tickets for both my parents and me to Jakarta with two of my lovely bridesmaid in December! My parents agree to go Jakarta as their pension activity and two of my bridesmaid is very much excited! What’s even more exciting is that my bridesmaid will be planning for their wedding too which is next year! We all have planned not to have any clashes in date but we’re yet to have everyone for dinner and discuss on the available dates but so far I heard no clashes yet.

Planning to go there this December before Christmas to browse or probably just shopped for few items on the checklist too to reduce the load. I stumbled across few bloggers that gave good reviews on where and what to find in Jakarta particularly Ka Fiza

 

Anyhow, from what I’ve read and what my mom told, the places in Jakarta that is worth going is:

1. Mangga Dua

2. Pasar Mayestik

3. Tanah Abang

4. Pasar Jatinegara *situated at bandung

Seriously I don’t know where all the areas are listed above. I’ve been to Indonesia couple of times during my childhood days but not as an adult so I assume it’ll be my first time!

Gosh I’m so excited that I can’t wait for the next payroll to come out! Need to purchase that ticket as soon as possible. Set aside the work leave I’m going to take, buy the ticket first that have the boss sign for approval whether the boss likes it or not!

So back to shopping areas in Jakarta, suggestions on the places I should visit is very much appreciated. Shops that provide printing of invitation cards, cheap laces, telekong, wedding favors and anything that I must visit!

HOTELS! Yes, due to conditions I don’t know how Jakarta is. I want hotels to be near with Mangga 2 because I heard it’s like a shopping heaven for wedding preparations. I goggled for hotels nearby mangga 2 and it looks like mangga 2 is huge areas so I got very confuse and afraid of security reasons too. My parents previously stayed at Batavia Hotel and when I read review that its sort of declining services, now that I’m not sure to trust or not. But anyhow, I heard Hotel Ibis Jakarta Mangga Dua Hotel & Apartment offers good price and also walking distance to Mangga Dua. I do want to know where else is advisable and recommended apart from Hotel Ibis. Please do e-mail me at z.inaza@yahoo.com for trips advisor or drop in a comment.

and of course I post my trip reviews and loads of photos around the areas for future brides in the near future! =)

You’re Répondez s'il vous plaît

Photo Courtesy of Van-G

I was discussing with my parents about wedding venues and my dad insisted to have a wedding in a hotel. Yes, the past few months I’ve been contacting hotels banquet manager on the maximum capacity they can occupy, food & beverages prices and the packages included. So far I fell in love with only ONE out of the number of hotels however, it can only occupy up to 900people only. I will be having an appointment again this Friday morning with the banquet manager in one of the hotels that can fit more than 1000 people. This process takes a longer time because I need to widen my options and calculate the budget simultaneously thinking if it’s worth to pay thousands for a banquet.

By Friday, I might and maybe settle for a venue. I just need to visit this one hotel and get a peek on it and discuss. If the deal is good then I might just take it and tutup mata. Personally, small number of guest say around 500 people or 600 people is rather enough but my parents insisted me to search for a hall that can occupy 1000 people! I’ve made my guest list and sums up to 250 people that includes +1. So if I were to select the 900 maximum capacity hotels; that give my parents 325guest to invite with their +1.

Something interesting to know about most people who attend the wedding is usually a +2 instead of a +1 or even a +3. That leads to no seats available for the other guest to be seated and enjoy the wedding. It’s risky and tricky too, some say from the number of invitation you sent out subtract 20% and that will be your real guest. Say 500 invitation sent out only 400 will attend with +1 and you have like an extra of 200 seats available. However, if you were to make your wedding in a hotel that offers BND$25/head or above will certainly be wastage to pay extra empty tables don’t you think? That is what I’m afraid of!

So I merely suggested my parents to have a R.S.V.P. Confirm guest will be allocated to their seat husband and wife. Mixed seating. Due to circumstances that the guest is invited with their family then they will have to reply text or call to tell the number of family members they will be bringing even if that guest decides to bring the maid, still included in the guest list. Well no matter what, all the invitations will be provided with a RSVP card or maybe just text or call to confirm their attendance. No wastage in invitation cards and also you know how many guest will be coming to witness your wedding reception. Say if a guest is not able to come to the wedding, and you forgot to invite someone, they could replace that empty seats. You also can confirm to the hotel how many guest will be coming and not paying extras too.

My parents replied? “kadang-kadang orang ani menyaya bah.. durang bagitau tah 2 orang sekali datang nya seraban” and my dad just nodded with agreeing what my mom told. I once attended my relative wedding in Malaysia and they have this R.S.V.P thing and she told me that it’s just great plan. We were seated accordingly with family members and not with strangers and I find it very pleasing. Anyhow, They didn’t object nor agree with my suggestion but, I just hope I can make that plan work! And hope that as we step in a modern era, people perspective will change towards attendance of wedding invites and be more professional by... replying to R.S.V.P... *amin*


By the way,

SELAMAT MENYAMBUT BULAN RAMADHAN to all Muslim’s around the world. Di dalam bulan yang penuh mulia ini. Semoga puasa kita mendapat keberkatNYA.

Fasting starts tomorrow!

1 Year Being His Fiancé

9 Ogos 2009 M bersamaan dengan 18 Sya’aban 1430 H

The Dulang for The Engagement Ring

Today marks our 1st year as an engaged couple and with that, I decide to share my story on how we came up with the decision to get engaged. I was still in the UK and was rather surprise when he mentions to take another step forward over the phone. He did give me links on engagement rings choices and diamond sizes to white gold or platinum. But I was silly enough not to get the hint! I guess because the other half loves to talk about evergreen stuff ranging from fashion attire, handbags to jewelry so when he gave those links, I just give him my opinions what I find beautiful not getting the hint! Would you believe that I don’t know anything about diamonds until the other half explains to me the sparkle, the carat and all the details! Anyhow, winter last year; he came to UK and there the parents called the both of us and talked. That it’s best for us to take a step forward in the mist of preparing a wedding as our relationship is almost 5 years that time. I guess he knew that the discussions coming hence, the internet links and ring choices! Simple right? No engagement proposal what so ever, just a discussion made from the parents.


So whilst I was still in UK, the other half visited my parents and told his intentions of his next step forward; engagement. He mentions it over dinner with my parents and my mom thought he was joking and my dad was shocked! Hehe tediam bah my dad and te-stop from makan.. The other half is a spontaneous type of person and just gets direct to the point so that shocked my dad. Both my parents agreed and let I decide the final decision to agree on the engagement. Then over skype, I talked to my mom and she mentions about the other half on his intentions, I just kept quiet and give me sometime to think. Yes, most of the ladies out there would be so excited when it comes to getting engaged but surprisingly, I didn’t get that feeling just maybe because my mind was occupied with dissertation in mind and exams.

My Engagement Ring & Pembuka Mulut Ring

After dissertation and exams, he came to UK again to find the “perfect” engagement ring for me. We did browse through a whole lot of selection around London and I’m torn between choices. Ranging from high end jewelry boutiques from De’Beers to Tiffany & Co. to the regular jewelry shops when I found the perfect one at H.Samuel! The other half insisted on the tiffany princess cut ring but when I tried on it, it doesn’t really suite me that well. Noting Wow & Aww, although the thought of having the blue box with white ribbons do feel tempting but the shoe just doesn’t fit so we search elsewhere. De’Beers engagement rings~ I’ve got to love their designs! The other half loves it too but the price is over the top so we just keep that as one of our wish. We settled on the “Forever Diamonds” it just perfect. I love it because the diamond is lifted by 4 prongs and inside the ring is engraved with the word “forever” with a diamond in its “o”. When the ring got adjusted to my size, paid and collected, from that moment; the feeling is more assure that I’ll be someone’s fiancé soon.


The engagement ceremony was very simple. I had my attire tailored last minute and bought the material at Shimco, luckily my long time tailor Winnie of NIE boutique is being very sweet and kind to complete the attire in less than 1 week with highlights & embroidered. I had my girlfriends helping me out with the make-up and just simple! Mum wanted Ally MUA to do make up but I told her that it’s just an engagement and I don’t want to waste money because I’m not working yet!


The function is fully arranged by the parents, from the tents to the food and beverages and door gifts. The food and beverages came from in-house, my mom has a catering business so that saves cost. The door gifts! I forgot what it was but I think it was this traditional snacks (?) sapit and other kueh kering. The engagement ceremony, Alhamdulillah, everything went well. Noting grand to share about the ceremony, just a ceremony where the elderly discussing on the future wedding plans. I had my best friend and my brother being unpaid photographers for me. I will just share photos of my rings for Pembuka Mulut & Tanda Tunang, as I prefer to stay anonymous for the time being. =)

My Forever Diamonds Engagement Ring

My personal view on bertunangan is it’s a phase for you and your other half to do the wedding preparations; it will certainly test both you and your partner patience. Kata orang-orang tua, “jangan batah-batah mun udah tunang, kawin tah capat-capat” I guess ada benarnya with pesanan dorang pasal... Pertunangan ialah hanya satu komitmen yang belum pasti.. could be a happy ending or the other way round *Nazubillah Minzalik* Protect your pertunangan phase because it is true that telalu banyak dugaan dihadapi, kerana hasad manusia yang dengki, sakit hati dan sebagainya boleh melakukan perkara tidak baik bagi meruntuhkan mahligai yang akan dibina.





GOOD LUCK & STAY STRONG to the engaged couples out there who’s in the mist of preparing your wedding just like me. Sabar-sabar saja cia danger request dari parents, saudara-mara and friends. Patience.

The Pembuka Mulut Ring bought by the fiancé's mother.

Dear fiancé,
Little that we know we’re on our 1st anniversary being engaged. We’ve been through a lot of hurdles throughout our 5 years of relationship but I’m glad that we came to realize that we needed each other. To our happy endings.


With lots of love,
You’re other half.

Wedding Bloggers & Bridesmaid.

I can’t emphasize enough that wedding bloggers especially from Malaysia is very informative when it comes to their preparation. Each and every blogger has its own unique way in approaching their wedding day preparations. Some came up with deliriously beautiful ideas on wedding management. It’s so lucky that in Malaysia there are varieties of hall to be used for their wedding day and almost all the halls is all beautiful as it is. I even told my mother that I love my wedding to be in Malaysia, preparation makes it easier, consider a bit cheaper too compared to Brunei. It would be easier for my Malaysian relatives around Miri, Kuching and Bintulu but tough for my Bruneian relatives and friends.


Anyhow, I can’t THANK YOU enough for the heads up and inspiration on the bloggers wedding preparations. Especially on the tips on their Jakarta trip! At least I get a rough estimate how much money I will be spending there and what to seek for too. You see, I’m trying to plan my wedding without menyusahkan banyak my friends or relatives because they have a life, commitments and family to take care of. Since I’m the only girl between my siblings, preparations are a bit tough for me. InsyALLAH I hope I can manage my own wedding and be my own wedding planner. I have my bestfriend helping me out but she’s only available on weekends because she’s working in Seria.

Speaking of which, BRIDESMAID!

I’ve never come across Bruneian weddings having bridesmaid. There maybe few weddings that has bridesmaid but not the wedding that I’ve attended. Most of the weddings that I know only has flower girls which when one of them is very playful, everyone jumps in being playful and out of sync! Most well; all Malaysian weddings has bridesmaid! And I sort of like the idea of it too… first, if I have my girlfriends they could help in the seating arrangement... I.e. they can easily guide my other friends/ work colleagues to a certain area.

One thing about Brunei wedding even in hotels have this ladies on one side and men on the other and no mixed seating’s unless the bride request for only her friends to have mixed seating’s. This separate seating is still practice up till now and this makes the guest list even more because of the ladies. I’m not blaming but its fact. You go to a wedding with your husband/boyfriend/fiancé then when it comes to seating you get separated. The guys? Don’t worry because they can make friends easily and don’t care much but for us the ladies, we don’t want to be left alone, SO; we tag along our friend/children/sister to accompany us which makes the guest list +1! I did consult my parents that if would be nice to have mixed seating’s but due circumstances of M.I.B (Melayu Islam Beraja) my dad didn’t quiet agree on mixed seating’s because he’s afraid people might talk about it after the wedding. *rolls eyes* But still! I’m trying my best to convince for a mixed seating’s if my wedding to be held in some hotel or hall.

Back to bridesmaid! They could help me with preparations too especially me being the only girl in my siblings. I see a lot more benefits too which I am not sure what! What are the tasks of a Bridesmaid in a Malay Wedding? Its blur and I haven’t had the exact idea on it. However, how do I choose my bridesmaid? I know I have one maid of honor which is my best friend of more than 10 years! Bridesmaid… what is the maximum number? 8 is a crowd don’t you think?

On the bridesmaid attire, I have exactly what colors, design in mind! Shopping in Jakarta for bridesmaid attire would be one task! Need to get the right colors to match with their skin.

I’m sooooo excited just writing about bridesmaid till I’m lost in words! Till next time. I think I need to put in some pictures to make it move lively! Haha

The 6th Consumer Fair is happening NOW till the 1st of August 2010, held at the Bridex Hall at Jerudong. I heard that the ticket to London only cost BND$777! Dirt cheap I tell you! *sigh* I haven’t got the chance to go there and I heard the crowd.. ramai berabis! Since I’m not good in big crowds, I get nervous breakdown so I’m not going there. =( BUT, I have a Miri weekend getaway today!

Have a lovely weekend ladies!

Pre-preparation : Surveying.

I’ve discussed with my mother on what favors that I will give during the occasion and she agreed on most of them. I also told her that I would like to go to Jakarta, Indonesia end of this year just to survey stuff, get the pricing correct, quotation for invitations, door gifts and arranged on the family and bridesmaid attire. I heard from my cousins that Jakarta is just the place for wedding preparations and I stumble across a Malaysian lady blogger; Fiza who is very informative in giving rough estimated prices and where to go and what to do there. My mom did told me that going to Mangga 2 is the place to buy stuff because its really cheap and there’s this one more place I’m not quiet sure where it is.

So I’m setting my targets what to look for if my trip is confirm, I’ll seek for:

1. Invitation cards
2. Laces or fabrics for family and bridesmaid.
3. Wedding day favors.
4. Majlis Akad Nikah favors.
5. Bebedak favors for the ladies and gentlemen.
6. Evening Reception i.e. appreciation dinner.

Which I hope I won’t go overboard in surveying for wedding stuff!
Since Tun Mahatir Musical theater will be on at Istana Budaya, Malaysia from 24th September 2010 till 4th October 2010 & Natrah Theater will be showing from 25th November 2010 till 5th December 2010. I might be watching one of the musicals. I’ve missed the chance watching Tan Sri P.Ramlee musical and I wouldn’t want to miss watching Tun Mahatir Musical or Natrah! Tickets are on sale now and I’m left to ask the fiancé if he’s available on either date for a short vacation in Malaysia. Not only to ask the fiancé but also friend(s) willing to tag along because to go on a vacation with only two of us is a big no-no. If this plan going to Malaysia is also confirm then my mission there would be:

1. Searching designers for my Solemnization ceremony.

• (Recommendations from readers is very much appreciated in this one. I've read there are some blacklisted designers as well and i'm afraid that i went into the wrong one so it would be great help to e-mail and inform which to avoid and recommended)

2. All those arts and crafts items such as ribbons & flowers.
3. Alas for the hantaran i.e. the modern gangsa if that’s even possible to get.
4. Trays for the hantaran i.e. the modern English theme trays, cages.
5. Pay a visit to this place I found that offers beautiful pre-wedding photos and ask for the price!


I’ve discussed with dear fiancé and he agrees on buying stuff either from Indonesia and Malaysia IF that can save cost! There’s no confirm dates when I want to go to Jakarta but I told my mom that we just booked our tickets first and if the fiancé parents wants to tag along after they come back for good from elsewhere they could purchase the tickets last minute. I am aware that items may need to be shipped and I hope it wouldn’t cost as much. If shipping to Miri, Sarawak is cheaper then I may use my relative’s address, that’s my plan B.


I seriously need to buy more bridal magazines! I’ve just purchased my very first bridal magazine “Pengantin” hehe and got overly excited already looking at Pelamin, Chairs, decorations and all for sale like borong! I felt like opening up a boutique hehe.

Any recommended magazines that I should purchase? Informative ones? & places that sells wedding items i.e. hantaran trays, ribbons and the arts and crafts stuff in Malaysia preferably around Selangor?

The Room: Planning

The initial plan is to extend the guest room on the ground floor for my future room. My current room is very cramp and relatively small with built in furniture’s and loads of stuff toys! When one comes into my room, they will definitely think it’s my niece or little brothers’ room. Hence, when the time comes that I going to get married, I need to be out of that room and let my little brother have my room. Then my parents told me to get their room and they will take the ground floor room. Soon when my brother found out that I’m planning to get married he told me to get his room instead because he’ll be moving out end of this year. Personally, I prefer to get my brother room because of the fair space. My parent’s room is too huge for me and I don’t like really big rooms! Big rooms = more space = you tend to buy nonsense stuff and to do even more shopping now and in future and most of all is that big room doubles the effort to cleaning it as well.

Anyhow, I don’t know exactly how much it would cost for room renovation. Say if I were to inherit my brother room which is currently fully carpeted in light with hints of dark blue color! Should I just stick with it or replace it with new carpets? The current condition is still alright, colors still in place but you know, it’s been there for almost 10 years and there’s few spots from liquid spillage and all. The furniture is still in excellent condition too. I’m in a dilemma to either buy a new set of furniture or just stick with the current one. I would love to have new furniture but then again, good and modern furniture set would cost roughly around BND$3000 am I correct? I did browse through furniture shops around Brunei and I have to say GUCCA @ Neometro situated at Batu Besurat or Delima Complex (behind tyre mart) has one of the best mattress and modern looking beds. Mattress price? *pengsan* ranges from above a thousand to many many thousands! The quality and comfort? Also pengsan, it’s so comfortable to the core that you just want to lie down there forever. I might exaggerate a bit there but yes, they’ve got one of the best mattresses by far. Framix (beside Maju Motors, Telanai) has also one of the best bedrooms set too but expensive!

I’m so curious to know roughly how much would cost me to renovate a room. With new bedroom set, new paint and get those decorations as like a backdrop, probably replace old carpets with new carpets or wooden flooring design, some minimal decoration to make the room beautiful for the occasion. The dream room would be having a walk in closet where I could stack my shoes beautifully; my handbags neatly arranged just like in princess diaries! It’s to die for! I bet all ladies out there would love to have a walk in closet too right? Anyway, back to reality! That’s not going to happen until I decide to design my own house to build! So I’m thinking is it possible to get the room renovated below BND$5k?

I’m also wondering if asking a quotation to the entire interior designers available in Brunei is FOC or we have to pay a fair amount of money to get them design. Hmm...


Now where’s that measuring tape?

The Hantaran Deco Inspiration.

So me and the other half discussed on our hantaran almost all the time. We even argued on what to give each other with the budget we’re in. I love handbag and shoes; he loves expensive watches so that sort of made the cash flow goes out faster. Budget! Budget! Kept telling ourselves that! I hope by the time we go shopping for hantaran stuff, our rezeki pun lebih InsyALLAH. We're money crunching right now! Dining in restaurants pun nda exclusive lagi just to try to save more money! Anyhow! I stumble across a lot of Malaysian wedding blog with pictures of their hantaran and most of it is absolutely gorgeous! They tend to go to simplicity design and single item for example a pair of shoes, a handbag, everything single, I told the other half about it and he sort of agree on it and not over do it. I would love my hantaran to be single item with simple design yet elegant.


I would like the design to be a lot of white and red with touch of black too. I planned on having my Solemnization dress to be in white chiffon or very light design white lace with embroidery and diamond sequence of red, black and white. So I want it to sync. For the other half, I would love his white attire to be sewn in red thread too as a contrast. For his hantaran design I’m not sure what color theme he would prefer yet because the other half is very picky in color codes with the item to be placed. Having his hantaran of the same design is no harm too, we could invert the colors, I have the white he can have the silver. I would really love the idea of having apple green pastel with pastel light pink as a combination, it looks so natural too.

A lot of inspiration of how to design the hantaran came from Arma Couture Collection and White Lace Tale Wedding. The idea of Arma Couture collection to keep the colors simple is elegant. I love the cushion they used for placing the items too but I bet that’s custom made, I can’t get any information so far on where to get those items. How I wish that my wedding is in Malaysia! Make preparation simpler and faster too. Not to mention its varieties of modern design and its elegancy. I want a neat design. Red and white roses is very much preferable, not necessarily fresh flowers. I think I could get affordable plastic flowers that look real in Miri, Sarawak or Happy Star Trading in Batu Besurat. I haven’t’ been able to wander around to bridal boutiques or shops that sells wedding favors yet. I have a packed weekend full of weddings to attend.

On a brighter note, I have my bestlady to help me out on decorating the hantaran. It is the initial plan because if we were to buy stuff form Malaysia or elsewhere and get the glue gun working, I bet we can manage to pull off more like similar design. Just  Maybe. She decorated my sister in law hantaran and was so beautiful. Thanks for her creativity. There are some boutiques that specialize in decorating the hantaran I browsed here in Brunei Darussalam cost me BND$25/gangsa so imagine me and him having 10 each i.e. total of 20 x $25 = BND$500 for just that! No way am I spending $500 on a decorating tray that I need to return back to the boutique. Though, I sort of love how they design, very creative too. Sigh. Anyhow, I’d rather save that and rent it for others in future, who know one day I become a wedding planner too? Hehe...

For the time being..

My hantaran design inspiration..

FIRST : Arma Couture Collection

- It was love at first sight..

SECOND: While Lace Wedding Tales

- This is very simple and I love it too! It looks modern ethnic.

THIRD: 4 wedding ku

- Now they have loads of varieties that you wish your wedding is in Malaysia!

 AND...

More to come i think.. =)

Financially Prepared : Part II

To continue on my previous post, for this I will be concentrating more into the amount you were to spent on the events. Just roughly, noting serious or over the top.


Before I enter you in the financial calculation I would like to address to everyone that this is my wedding estimation. I don’t want to shock others that you’re wedding will cost similar like this, it’s 100% entirely depends how you want to celebrate your day and how much are you willing to splurge. Some wedding can cost you even less than BND$30 grand, so I emphasize; this depend highly on you personal needs and wants for your wedding day.

NOW, to start calculating on you wedding expenses you may need to:

1. List the number of events you’re indulging.

o We Bruneians have a number of tradition events that we ought to obey. Some parents didn’t really mind when we decide to skip one of the few traditions just as long as we don’t skip the most important event which is the solemnization ceremony. Skipping events means less money spent! So if you want to have a complete and just nice wedding, one thing you’ll have to do is negotiate with the parents. Provided with the credit crunch now days, I’m sure they will understand. So the number of events for I know the time being are:

• Berbedak Mandi
• Akad Nikah (Solemnization ceremony)
• Malam berbedak (Night of powdering)
• Malam Berinai/Berpacar
• Bersanding
• Ambil-Ambilan
• Muleh 3 Hari

Taken from Wikipedia

2. The number of guest for each event.

o You will need to estimate roughly or have a fixed number of guest for caterings, door gifts, wedding favors for some even that need the individual guest to come and give their blessing, the number of tents, You either don’t want to left out guest with no gifts or have no seats for them right? Yes, it’s true that our parents will say more is fine but less is not good. But, to have a well managed wedding and not to have that variation order, it’s best to keep the guest list minimal.

3. List out the number of bride and grooms gift to each other which is most likely to be known as the hantaran.

o Plan on what you want to put in the tray. This is one of the most famous sections in a wedding because people would really love to know what you’ve got in that tray. Expensive gifts shows pride and money the couple have. My honest say on this is that, this is unnecessary and overrated now. Just because your cousins or best friend has a Manolo Blahnik or a Christian Louboutin and the Chanel classic flip handbag on the tray, you have to beat them to it because your other half works with much higher pay then your best friend husband. It like a quiet feud happening on who affords what. This is just giving pressure to the soon to be wedded couples. I hope the mentality of people would change and spend wisely and don’t make a huge hole in your pocket for reasons of showing off. No point. You would want to wish to have a happy life together with your other half and not forking out his money to splurge on way expensive stuff that you may or not use it always because you’re afraid you might spill wine, fizzy drinks or whatever. Always remember, make sure that your other half can afford to get you that stuff you want, never forced them to buying because of love. Men’s also have their wish list that they wish you would buy them too but you couldn’t afford. E.g. a Ferrari? So think about it and compromise. Don’t pressure your other half.

4. List out the attire you want to rent and get tailored. Most bridal offers package for all events with the stage decorations and all sorts.

o Most brides would love to get their solemnization dress tailored to their own needs whilst have the other attire rented. For the well-off brides, they may get everything tailored. But anyhow, try to keep this as nice simple and clean. I’ve come across to some that came up with different colors! Just to symbolize uniqueness in their solemnization ceremony. My question, how many times in your life would you wear everything white? A white dress? Let it be unique in your life but not to others.

5. For the ladies, you’ve got to get a rough estimate for the bridal make up services.
o For all the i know make up services now ranges from BND$150-$200 to even $300 per session and much cheaper if you take a package. Since the make up services is blooming like mushrooms similar like photographers, remember to try this make up artist first before any of your occasion. Bring it on a test drive and see if it's suites you. Some professional make up artist does a perfect job and turned a bride to her most beautiful moment but some just don't work. Give it a try first!

6. List out the events you would love to use fresh flowers.
o Usually there are only two events that use hand bouquet. Solemnization and Sanding ceremony.

7. The wedding cake!
o Yes wedding cakes especially the modern fondant and air brush cake doesn’t come cheap like icing. They’re pricy and to have a quality cake, ready to fork out hundreds!

So what are you waiting for? Get a piece of paper and list out what do YOU want in your wedding and estimate them.

Always, think about the flow of the occasion on that day from the arrival of guest, to being the bride to being the mother of the bride, the father of the bride, Be Everything so you won’t miss out of minor details that we tend to overlooked and forget.

  

GOOD LUCK!

I do have an example here based on my imagination and experienced attending weddings..

Solemnization ceremony. (I’m only going to cover up for the ladies side)


o THE BRIDE

1. Your solemnization DRESS: this is entirely up to you, either to get it tailored to your likings or rent it from the bridal boutique.
2. Your solemnization SHOES: I’ve always loved a white strappy heels looks sexy. Wear stockings makes it nicer.
3. Your solemnization SCARF/VIEL: some forget that we need a nice bling brooch or pin to clip the scarf. You if you’re planning on wearing the normal scarf that requires brooch and pin. You need to purchase them in textile shops. For those who use the new trend scarf that needs you just to slip it in, noting to be worried about.
4. Your solemnization ACCESSORIES: Crown, bracelet, rings, and necklace. You either use your own bling collection or hire from the bridal boutique. I’ve always prefer no rings on the left hand because I want the wedding ring to be the only one in the finger. Makes it more distinguish in pictures and special.
5. Your solemnization HAND BOUQUET: Some would like to hold something while sitting down waiting for the soon to be husband be your husband! It would lovely to have some fresh flowers to hold on too, breaks down the nervous feeling too.
6. Your solemnization MAKE UP: now this has always been the 1st thing to think about on a wedding so I don’t have to elaborate into this right? Just make sure that when you use heavy fake eyelashes, when taking pictures... Make sure you open up your eyes. Especially ones that has small eyes. You wouldn’t want most of your pictures sleeping right?

o THE ROOM

1. FURNITURE & DECORATIONS: May or may not need new furniture but you know the rest, get the bed area decorated. Reason? Your wedding photo.
2. LIGHTING: make up purposes and photographers. *No cost just a reminder
3. KEYS: Now, when everyone is busy witnessing the bride solemnization ceremony, whom will take care of the room? So always make sure to lock the room and give the keys to someone you trust that won’t do any harm. No keys? You’ve got to get them locked no matter what. *No cost just a reminder
4. TEMPERATURE: Since there’s people going in and out the room, populated and crowded, you may need to set the air conditioner to the lowest temperature earlier on. *No cost just a reminder

o THE EVENT

1. CATERINGS: Always do food tasting before hiring a caterer. Enough said.
2. DOOR GIFTS: Every occasion has a door gift that you need to prepare. Solemnization ceremony door gift is usually simply and noting over the top. Remember, have of give something that you can afford and not bebankan yourself.
3. GUEST: Have friends, cousins, siblings and parents to help the guest seated and let them socialize; don’t worry too much if either the tents is already full or half empty. Nevertheless, you will still enjoy your wedding.

o THE HANTARAN

1. MEN GIFTS: Prepare and numbered the items. Place it in a very safe place, away from kids running around, away from crowds as item can go missing. Decorations? That’s entirely up to yourself to DIY or hires some people to decorate them for you.
2. LADY GIFT: So before the solemnization ceremony start, there will be this “Hantar Berian” ceremony that took place where both side will exchange gift. Items received from the men’s side, have some people, friends or cousins to help them bring up to your room and arranged them. If the items being placed just beside you on the solemnization ceremony, its fine. As long as someone keep’s an eye on those trays.

o THE CEREMONY

1. PELAMIN/ STAGE: It’s always nice to have the stage prepared early for photo taking purposed between the bride and groom. Enough lighting and don’t overcrowd them with organza running from one pole to one pole, some might trip on it during photo session. Keep it simple, hazard free.
2. LAPIK: When the solemnization ceremony took place, the bride will have to sit behind the groom. I’ve seen this arrangement and it’s lovely, the bride will be able to see her soon-to-be husband Lafazkan nikah and everything. The groom will have his Lapik and four candles but always, the ladies forgot that they will need a lapik too for her to sit down to witness the ceremony.
3. SOUND CHECK: Have the family members or who ever is in charge of the sound system to check thoroughly. Make a sound check so everything is clear and there will be no glitches that will interrupt the ceremony.
4. RING: Prepare and make sure you assign someone to hold the ring that you will need to place on your husband’s finger. Soon after the ceremony, there will be “batalkan air wudhu” so soon after that will be the exchanging of ring followed by a kiss in the forehead (optional).

From here you could just get a rough estimate on how much one occasion will cost you and of course, wedding management! =)

Financially Prepared : Part I

Now everyone wishes to have a perfect wedding. We are all aware that wedding does not come cheap especially in Brunei Darussalam where most of the stuff i.e. ribbons; wedding favors are at marked up prices. This urges us, Sadly Bruneians to shop elsewhere for wedding favors, dresses and all those stuff we need for the wedding. Totally not helping the country economy here, but this is my personal opinion and natural fact that we love to splurge money elsewhere, don’t we? I think like typical Bruneians as well so by splurging elsewhere sounded more exclusive isn’t it?


So first and foremost, in planning a wedding and to make your dream wedding come true, you have to be financially ready on the money you would splurge. You have to be aware on the cash you will spend. I myself had a rough estimation on how much my wedding would cost and the cost includes the other half too. Mind you, being an engineer changes the way you think that I took it too much in my wedding plans as if making a BQ(Bill of quantities) to avoid that variation order i.e. overspent. My god, to have a good and beautiful wedding of your dreams cost you more than BND$50 grand for only the ladies side. The men’s side would be slightly cheaper because they have much simpler events and they didn’t have to think for complicated, well-tailored attire, make up artist and ladies stuff. For us Ladies, this planning is one of the most tedious and time consuming. But what can I say, want a perfect wedding? You’ve got to work for it and planned it!


Remember, that it’s your wedding day. If your wedding is from your own money earned and savings, remember; that it’s your money and you wouldn’t love the idea of overspending. You have to be aware of hidden expenses in a wedding too, the nearer the wedding date; the more obstacles that requires money comes your way. So stay strong and keep your heads up to a positive beautiful wedding. Some plan wedding two years in the phase of their engagement which I think is just nice to save up cash for the wedding. This is my calculation, if you alone save up BND$1500/monthly in 24 months you mange to save BND$36,000. The more you save the more money you have for your wedding day. But mind you, you’ve got to be strict. At least either you or the other half has to be strict in managing the money not to withdraw or have the urge to use the money even it’s for temporary and the promises to top up the money taken back. Trust me; it will never happen because we all have temptations when it comes to money.



What’s great is that, I would encourage partners opening up a joint account especially for wedding savings and with no ATM card at all. Fixed deposit is good as well but the return is slightly lower and you have to put in a fixed amount with hassle and bustles. I’m not an expert in terms of the availability of banking facilities so excuse me. By opening up a regular bank account for the sake of the wedding could seriously save your day than taking up personal loan just for a wedding.



One point to keep in mind is that you’re splurging into an event that last only for hours, taking up a loan is not a smart choice it will just destroy in your future planning. Taking an example; you take up a loan for the maximum of 7 years with your monthly deduction of probably less than BND$1000. You are just letting daylight robbery to take place i.e. paying the bank interest. 7 years is a very long period and by your 1st or 2nd year of marriage you would be blessed by offspring’s of your own. Then when they grow up, you have to think about their education, clothing, food and damn diapers and formula milk doesn’t come cheap now a day! Then you’ve got your individual car loans to pay. When your parents’ house gets cramped, you need to move out. Lucky to government servants having the beneficial of subsidize house rental charge so you may have a bonus there. People just love taking up loans. Just as they’ve finished paying for their personal wedding loans, gifted by probably 5 kids, you’ve got to take up another loan; house loan. So it’s a continuous process of letting daylight robbery happened to yourself. You see that flow? The financial commitment? You might as well get married with the bank than your man! Which personally for me, it’s not an exception. You will feel much more satisfied spending money that you’ve earned and collected throughout the months. Some may say, you’ve got more money when guest gave money as a wedding gift to pay the expenses. How about this, If you spend on your wedding with your own money, the gifted money you could use it for your honeymoon and shopping. Nice isn’t it?


So think about it… think smart. =)

I apologize if I’ve got anyone offended by my post but this is just my piece of mind and absolutely no intentions on hurting others.

Foreword.

First and foremost, I never expect I’ll be blogging publicly again after years going underground in blogging and setting it to private but here I am talking about my wedding preparations and thoughts on wedding.

Thanks to the technology now a days that there’s a lot of wedding blogs Brunei as well as Malaysia that offers great help in wedding preparations. This helps us; the bride to be...save us money, time and most importantly, much more organize wedding.

I opened up this blog is more like a wedding book for me. I do plan on having a scrap book for my wedding preparations but a blog seems to be good enough as you can upload photos and scanned documents. Most importantly, inputs from readers!

Year by year we can see wedding events getting more modernize and most of the events are held in the hotel and all sorts of wedding deals from photographers, bridal boutique and many more. So I hope thought out my preparation will able to help others too planning on their special day.

Would like to thank you all the wedding bloggers that gave me inspiration on how to plan a proper wedding and get organize! Hugs.

So the regular question would be… the Proposed wedding date?

Insya-Allah. It will be sometime middle of next year 2011. No exact date yet. But we’re planning on an August/September/November wedding.

So I better start planning!